Xmas Part I

Hey internet! Obviously I have not been writing much on here, ever. Until recently I had this idea that I needed to have serious, well-thought-out, multiple-point essays up my sleeve in order to be a blogger. It has come to my attention that this is a completely erroneous concept; That, in fact, one can be a decently successful (and lucrative, apparently) blogger and somehow at the same time an utterly mediocre essayist. I have no idea how this works, since it seems to me that being able to write a coherent article on thought-provoking topics was the whole point of any even vaguely journalistic endeavor, thus my confusion and insecurity. 

But shit, I can scribble half-baked commentary better than many, so what the hell? I come up with ideas all the time, some of which get written out, might as well put a few things out there. It's not as if anyone is paying any attention, anyway. It could be fun to develop skills in a different medium.

Today's topic is, predictably enough, Thanksgiving. Or, as I have taken to calling it, Xmas Part I. Is it my imagination, or is this the first year the Powers That Be have changed the radio and shopping music a week before Thanksgiving? I don't think it's outrageous to say that these extra reminders are completely unnecessary. 

Thanksgiving is slowly becoming Christmas's dress rehearsal - All the family and food without the tree and presents. At least one reason behind this leaps to mind, which is the immateriality of the holiday. There are only so many turkeys they can sell us, and it's hard to  commercialize driving 5 hours to have dinner with your aunt. It's a very unglamorous holiday, and the central idea is to be thankful for the stuff we already have. It really shouldn't be surprising that it's slowly slipping to the wayside. Take a look at what's happening to Halloween, which used to be about trick-or-treating, teenage pranks, and genuinely getting the crap scared out of you. The first time I saw a blow-up pumpkin in someone's yard I knew something was terribly wrong.

Halloween used to be my favorite holiday, and people used to look at me funny for it. It was the underdog holiday, I loved how low-key and spooky it was. Hollow gourds and shadows. Halloween lights? Really, people? The absurdity of a holiday about death and hedonism being slowly made to more resemble Christmas is something out a Tim Burton movie. 

And now it's Thanksgiving that's getting walked over. Is there a parade? They cancelled it, I think, but it doesn't matter because no one I know cares. The one thing that is commercial about Thanksgiving is the football. (I'll digress on this, professional sports is a rant for another day.) So the 'Christmas Season' - whatever exactly that means - lacks any real beginning and so is leaking little by little into the preceding weeks and months. 

I understand that these are arbitrary cultural definitions and only hold meaning while we all agree they do, but this brings me back to my point about the music. I know I am not the only one who detests most Christmas music. Give me the goddam Nutcracker or GTFO. And here in Cleveland, we lose two of our better radio stations to the stuff this time of year, and we really can't afford them. To say nothing of going to the drug store for a bag of chips. It's inescapable. And completely pointless. 

I've heard stories from people older than me who recall a time when Christmas music was played on the radio on Christmas Eve, or maybe the week of. I'm starting to think that one day I will be telling younger people about how Black Friday used to be this big shopping frenzy, the start of the 'Christmas Season' the day after Thanksgiving. And I'm wondering fatalistically if they might ask, "Thanksgiving?"